Happiness comes in all sorts of ways. I remember working in Moscow as a photographer in a Water Park. Covered in chlorine water up to my knees, squatting to catch exciting faces of happy kids, going back home on a cold winter's night (the type of cold when hair in your nostrils freezes) I felt like it wasn't the right type of adventure for me. I remember always having that feeling of discomfort and complete and utter disappointment like I had to settle for what I had... I felt old, boring and stripped of freedom and possibilities.
Taking a leap into going back home to Ireland and starting my own photography business was scary. Having musicians as friends even scarier. Like I mean, what sort of influence can THEY be, you may think. Last weekend I was on the road with those same musicians going to Donegal for a gig and I realised that I haven't felt like I did in Moscow for almost 3 whole years. I felt content, anxious to create, confident and simply silently happy.
I have learned so much from my creative and dedicated musician friends. I have travelled to so many places with them and without them. I have learned more about Ireland than I have in all of those years while growing up. I maybe struggling every day but in actual reality I am happy. All I ever wanted 5 years ago is here. And I am happy.
Happiness definitely doesn't scream in your face. Not like sadness, disappointment and failure. Happiness is like light on a sunny day. To notice it, you have to clear your windows from all the dirt and clutter and let it in while it's there.